It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize