is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
