Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
