And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
only if we run a train.
done.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize