i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
