Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
