Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
3pm strippers are depressing
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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