is your mom at the bar?
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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