Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
