My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i just wanna soil my oats bro
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Randomize
