the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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