I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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