Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
