Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
