Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
