Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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