i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
