I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
