Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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