Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
