ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
