What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
