he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize