I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
