I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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