We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
