he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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