im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
