No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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