All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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