Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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