got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Randomize
