Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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