Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
