just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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