hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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