What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
The dick lei will go down in squad history
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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