I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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