She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
pray to the hookup gods
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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