why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
There's even glitter on my cock...
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