the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
