we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
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