Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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