It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
