We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
