I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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