K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
