chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
