They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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