That's intense
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
someone owes me an orgasm
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
